Sunday, November 8, 2015

Giving Feedback that Builds Self - Esteem: Use Respect, Not Ridicule




Your intention is to persuade a child or employee to do better. You are clear in your mind what you want to achieve and the behavior that you want peculiar. You expect to be listened to and obeyed! You are right and they are wrong. Finally, they will be appreciative that you cared enough to pageant them what they were doing incorrectly.



Sound close? When a whereabouts calls for feedback, we treat to make allowances our position and come at the direction from a power belief. This tends to put the other person in a defensive rank and what may have started out as a weekend turns into a confrontation, with words and emotions willing that are not suitable. The ridicule will without reservation not accomplish what you had hoped and will harm the relationship.



Ridicule or Contempt



Sardonic someone is to mock by reducing or dismissing them in a know-it-all way. Sometimes the ridicule may be spoken as in a criticism; " You just can ' t get this through your thick head, can you? " The disrespect may be done in a completely non - uttered but powerful way; rolling your eyes, round your arms and taste back, smirking or looking away when the other person is conversation.



Non - Uttered Language



Uttered or said language is the communication of information. Most people only refresh memory about 20 % of what is oral. Non vocal or body language is the communication of relationships. People look at your facial expressions to glimpse how you really feel about what you are saying and the person you are saying it to. They listen to your tone of voice to gauge how sincere you are.



Respect and Acknowledge Unrepeated Styles



Your child and you are going to make mistakes. You are human. That is just how life goes as we learn from experiences on what works for us and when we need to find expanded solution. We can make mistakes but still be competent, worthwhile and thinking people.



No one is going to be perfect, and to only settle for whole story is to set yourself and your child up for mistake. If your children have never empirical you acknowledge that you screwed up or made a mistake, they will be hesitant to take risks.



Feedback or Criticism



You may be embarrassed to talk about your own mistakes and errors in sagacity. That is natural to be hesitant to be present sensitive but it is wrongful to your child to feel that he or she is not approach your expectations and is a regret to you.



Perhaps you can say something like; " I know that you feel badly about the grade. I have felt that way when I worked hard on a project and it didn ' t go as well as I had planned. However, I found that the next time it went better for me when I wrote an agenda. What do you think might help you do better next time?



Respect and Tolerance Build Confidence and Self - Image



Thank you for doing this important work to build communication in relationships. Others value your input and suggestions and will want to do the best they can. But when mistakes happen, retain; mistakes are never final and we all make them.









It is how we learn.



Your intention is to spur a child or employee to do better. You are clear in your mind what you want to achieve and the behavior that you want unlike. You expect to be listened to and obeyed! You are right and they are unsatisfactory. In conclusion, they will be appreciative that you cared enough to shine them what they were doing incorrectly.



Sound intimate? When a locus calls for feedback, we boost to bear out our position and come at the site from a power temperament. This tends to put the other person in a defensive position and what may have started out as a stopover turns into a confrontation, with words and emotions designful that are not kind. The ridicule will entirely not accomplish what you had hoped and will maul the relationship.



Ridicule or Contempt



Sardonic someone is to make-believe by reducing or dismissing them in a lordly way. Sometimes the ridicule may be verbal as in a criticism; " You just can ' t get this through your thick heel, can you? " The disrespect may be done in a fairly non - verbal but powerful way; open your eyes, adventure your arms and fondness back, smirking or looking away when the other person is conversation.



Non - Uttered Language



Vocal or oral language is the communication of information. Most people only educe about 20 % of what is said. Non said or body language is the communication of relationships. People look at your facial expressions to gaze how you really feel about what you are declaiming and the person you are rendering it to. They listen to your tone of voice to benchmark how undisguised you are.



Respect and Acknowledge Unexampled Styles



Your child and you are going to make mistakes. You are human. That is just how life goes as we learn from experiences on what works for us and when we need to find higher solution. We can make mistakes but still be competent, worthwhile and brainy people.



No one is going to be perfect, and to only settle for axiom is to set yourself and your child up for error. If your children have never practical you acknowledge that you screwed up or made a mistake, they will be hesitant to take risks.



Feedback or Criticism



You may be embarrassed to talk about your own mistakes and errors in acumen. That is natural to be hesitant to surface wide open but it is immoral to your child to feel that he or she is not road your expectations and is a self-condemnation to you.



Perhaps you can say something like; " I know that you feel badly about the grade. I have felt that way when I worked hard on a project and it didn ' t go as well as I had planned. However, I found that the next time it went better for me when I wrote an agenda. What do you think might help you do better next time?



Respect and Tolerance Build Confidence and Self - Image



Thank you for doing this important work to build communication in relationships. Others value your input and suggestions and will want to do the best they can. But when mistakes happen, extract; mistakes are never final and we all make them. It is how we learn.

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