Wednesday, September 9, 2015

A Call Out to All Perfectionists and Overachievers




I ' ve been observation a trend lately while working with women suffering from health issues. I coach women with pelvic pain issues of any shift, and I can ' t help but thought some commonalities. I am no longer surprised when I hear person after person impart herself as a unrealistic, an overachiever, a type A personality, an anxiety sucker, or someone who is very shy. Though not every client has all of these bag, these do seem to be the most common issues common by women dealing with pelvic pain issues. I absolutely have all of the superior personality being. As I ' ve pondered the connections between these stuff, the health issues, and my coaching knowledge, I have immediate to develop a theory.



I enshrine being described one time as a somatizer by a medical trained. The definition of a somatizer is " a sensitive with frequent physical complaints for which no organic basis is found. " Well, that amen did define me, I pass on. However, that didn ' t really help me find out myself or turn toward healing. Having learned Martha Beck ' s coaching tools, I can now connect the dots between my personality, intuition processes, and disease.



The main Martha Beck tool you need to explain this connection is called the Body Compass. It is really an awareness of your own physical self, and stage your deepest unhappiness and greatest joy reside within you, physically. Literally. If you think about the worst event in your life and gently scan your awareness over your body, you will discover that in conclusion in your body, you feel a physical sensation. This is your body ' s way of alerting you to things in your life that aren ' t good for you. If you think about the best event in your life - your happiest memory - you can inspect your body and discover the physical sensation that equals joy. Mine is this awesome spiraling sensation that begins in the focal point of my chest and grows another and supplementary as it moves upward toward my head. My body registers negativity in my stomach - I feel like there is a pile of rocks in there. If you tune in to your Body Compass recurrently, it literally works like a compass. You can imagine the things on your to - do inventory and witness what your body thinks of them. Laundry - not fully rocks in the stomach, but pebbles for hard. Writing - ahhh, big spirals moving up, up, up.



The key name there is " tune in to your body. " Did I do that, previous to my health affair? No, no, and no. Yea not. I was not one iota aware of my Body Compass. Well, when would I have found the time? I was too busy scheduling my never - ending catalogue of activities that needed to be complete quite, then beating myself up over the results, which never, ever uninterrupted my expectations. I was too busy anxiously analyzing body I did, scheduling more things to do, hating myself for not being perfect, ( seeing though nobody is perfect, I really should be ), and looking for the next thing I could achieve to make myself feel better about myself.









I ' m getting exhausted just remembering.



I educe activity the rocks - in - my - stomach motility in high give instruction, but I did not recognize it as my Body Compass. I perceiving I had an ulcer or something, because my stomach hurt all the time. Strangely, that invisible when I stopped dating the perverse - for - me person I was dating at the time. Then, in college, I had a recurrence of that stomach theory, right as I was pushing myself to take every refinement offered at the university and get direct A ' s in all of them. Hmmm. Did I listen? No, of course not. No pain, no gain, right?



I did not listen, and I did not listen, and I did not listen. So my body got louder, and louder, and louder. It refused to let me ignore it. First I got carpal hollow. Then I got bladder symptoms. Next was lower back pain. Followed by increased vaginal itching ( which always popped up along with the rocks - in - the - stomach ), followed by vaginal pain. Then, vulvar pain and burning. My body was so unwell of me not listening, that it was literally weak. And it only got sicker, and sicker, and sicker, until presently, I stopped item and tuned in to the poor physical home of my very slaphappy self.



Since that first moment of communication, my body and I have developed a fantastic relationship. For about a past after my vaginal symptoms went away, I would get a little twinge of burning anytime I contemplated something that wasn ' t right for me. I listened. Now, it ' s back to just the rocks in the stomach. I sit up and take consideration, take it me. I never want my body to have to wail again. Ever. It was not a pleasant experience.



My definition of a somatizer is this: someone whose body is screaming at them to listen to its messages. Why are we type A, overachieving, visionary, anxious, shy women prone to infection? My theory, and it ' s new and as someday brutish, is we are the women who do not listen to our Body Compasses. We are too busy, we are focused on our achievements, we are thinking about making subject perfect, we are stressing about every little thing, we are worrying about corporeality possible, and we are not confident within ourselves. We do not listen. It ' s time to tune in to these magical bodies that know much, much more than our minds. These prodigy bodies will keep guiding us, always, to our own North Stars, which is really just code for true joy, comfort, and happiness in the very core of your being.

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